Too Much Reading Was Never A Problem

© versebyversequranstudycircle.wordpress.com

     The moment you start reading a lot, is the moment you start to be afraid of yourself. You read books about controlling emotions, books about living in the moment and books to accept who you are as you are and so forth. By time you notice yourself practicing skills you never thought you would, you see yourself very dedicated to ensure healthy thinking and not rushing through what might happen in the future because no one knows what is going to happen. You notice yourself puling yourself back to today, when you notice being afraid and emotional about things that will happen tomorrow, you remember that whatever you're feeling right now, whether you feel like crying or anxious, is eventually forced on yourself by yourself. You shiver to the thought of harming yourself, but you happen to be the one doing so with your thinking. Keep it to the day when it comes to calm yourself, but then what happens when that day has come? You can't help but give in to reality and accept your reactions and the harshness of life, somethings are always against our wills, there is nothing we can possibly do about them but respect the flow of time and that only time will heal.

     Little did I know that I would be the one practicing all that, and eventually respecting that only time will heal, will it though?

     Yes, it will because you feel it will and because you believe it will. The day where you look back at your current self will come and you will feel proud of how you mastered the strength to accept reality and move on.

    Appreciating the journey to where ever it plans to take me.

I'm sorry my child

Dear child, 

For everything I have done that you might not be aware of when you are older, at this moment I am going to take the chance to apologize. For what I have caused to you, and for being the reason of your failure in your life.

I wish I can change what you are now.

I wish I can go back in time

If only I listened to you

If only I controlled myself and my desires and enjoyed your every moment in my life.

If only..

I'm sorry my child...

I'm sorry my child...

I wonder if that is what parents these days are going to write for their children to read when they grow up and start to understand life, wouldn't that be at least some effort done by the parents to make it up for what they made their children go through for the sake of them enjoying some quality time together, without their infants? How are they going to cure their regret, and their pain when they can not go back in time and change....

Dearest child,

Stay with auntie for the time being until mommy comes back from her beauty appointment.

But I don't want to stay wit Auntie , I want to go with you mommy.

Auntie is going to play with you and show you really nice videos on her iPad.


Mom puts on her clothes and sneaks out of the house while her child is distracted with something else. What about me mom? I do not want to be left behind, take me with you


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My Love,

Mommy has to leave you with nana while she goes to the hospital and get your baby brother. You will have someone to play with when I am back, you will be the big boy and big brother :)

Really mommy, I wanna go with you to bring baby brother.

No Sweety, you have to stay here until I get back okay, love you.

But I do not want to stay with nana alone, can I stay with daddy?

No my love, daddy is busy with work, you have to stay with nana till daddy gets home.

But I wanna stay with daddy.

Mom sneaks out again while her lover cries his heart out wanting to go with her.


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    We have come to the age where children became our setbacks from our desires and pleasures. They became the set backs that keep us from enjoying life the way we used to before we had them, we can not travel a lone the way we used to without having to bare the troubles of changing diapers, putting them to sleep and making sure they are not hungry anymore. But let us agree on one thing, as you pass through the different stages of your life, you are not going to live it the same way you used to, life of the singles is not like the life of the married and the life of the parent. The beauty though lies in the stages of you adapting to the changes in your life and embracing them, do not cause trouble and blame your kids for being your kids, if you did not have the courage and patience to raise them then why did you have them in the first place? It is not their fault, it is yours and yours alone, adapt to the changes and do not drop your kids and disregard them, they deserve all the attention and care god has given you the ability to share, it is not for you to keep it is for you to give and give and give.

Do not be their reason to an unhappy life and to their choice of depression and unloving people when they grow up, embrace the gifts you have from god and don't disregard them for your own pleasures. Don't prove yourselves to be unworthy of what you have, don't deform yourselves in shame in front of god.

Life's an echo

 © twitter.com

"Why the sadness and shock when that is what you give." Echo Bliss

    Growing up as a child, my mother always raised me on the basis of  "you get what you give". Nothing more, and nothing less. At that time, a child at such a young age would not really know what that meant, but as I grew up into the adult I am right now, done with high school successfully and now almost done with college, I came to learn the fact behind it all. My mother always knew what she was doing, she was that type of person that drew her life's path and goals clearly and worked to achieve them, no matter what obstacles and set-backs she faces, she got over them and go there. That' what I admire about her so much.

    She always said, if this is how you're treating people, then that's what you should expect from them in return. If you're nice to them, then do expect they would be nice to you at some point. If you've got a temper and threw out on them like it was their fault, then they'd throw their temper fists at you in return. However, the catch in it all was not to really expect anything, but to give and move on. She used the give and receive paradigm as children to make it easier for us to understand what she was aiming at, but as we grew, she emphasised on our Islamic principles more often by saying Allah will give you what you deserve and he always knows what your intentions are. As a senior at college, I cam to learn to do what I want to do and help people and respect them if I want to and not expect the same from them. Just do and move on with a smile on your face. You feel good about you do really and the best part of that little pleasure is that no one knows about it except yourself and Allah.

    When it comes down to someone hurting you and disrespecting you, you do not do the same, yet you do not keep it quite and just nod your head. There are always other way to express the hurt that's been indulged on you, and that's where most people fail. Their tempers always get the best of them, my temper gets the best of me sometimes, but I always revert back and try to deal with whatever it is in different ways.

    It all falls back to what you really want to do and what intentions you have, have them good or bad, you will - and I guarantee you with a 100% confidence - get what you give.

Think well of what you do because you only live once, so make the best out of it.